The tv is on.. But not watching it.. Something that had been my habit lately.. Switching it on just the sake of not wanting the house being quiet especially when my little princess is asleep.. I am so lucky to have her around.. At least I have someone with me while my life buddy goes to work every night.. Yupp.. My life buddy only works at night.. He will answer he is a "kupu-kupu malam" if anyone asking him.. Working in the music industry, especially with a boss who only works at night as the night brings the best of him so I could do nothing..
Today I had an experience of my life time.. Taking care of 6 kids - 11 years old, 7 years old, 5 years old, 3 years old and 2 one year old babies was a blast.. There are times I could feel my heart beating so fast I could fall any time.. There were times I shut down from hearing all the screaming and crying for the sake of my heart.. Luckily angah came back just on time.. We took the kids to KLCC later today and we had quiet a enjoying time even though it was damn tiring.. The part I enjoyed most was spending time at Kinokuniya..
I love book stores.. Even when I was much younger.. Abah and Mak will swap toys with books.. I am now teaching Rania the same.. Every time I had the chance to visit a book store I will take her too.. Giving her books to hold on (sometimes not even buying it) so she will enjoy the smell of new books (like i do.. hahahahah).. Today I left Rania walking through the isle at Kinokuniya.. Picking up any books of her likings (and again not buying it) but I do buy 2 special books for my life buddy though.. Adding up his books collections..
Actually I had missed few things that I use to love doing.. Reading for example.. Since my sis had pointed out that I might suffering pre-depression so I had looked out for depression signs.. One of the signs are "Loss of interest in daily activities. No interest in former hobbies, pastimes, social activities, or sex. You’ve lost your ability to feel joy and pleasure." Yupp.. I had loss interest in few things that I use to love before.. At first I thought it was because of Rania.. Because of my work load.. But I do think that my loss of interest is also due to depression.. So I am trying to beat it.. I had finished a paperback few days ago.. I frankly could not remember when I last read (and surely finish) reading one.. So I am trying my best doing things I love.. And surely one of it updating this blog.. Well.. So many things to do.. so little time.. But I can do it.. InsyaAllah..